Attitude

Hugo Chavez is sitting at home when the phone rings. He picks it up and says “Hello”. The voice at the end of the phone says “Hello Mr. Chavez, it’s Pedro here. I’m just ringing to let you know that we’ve declared war on your country.”

HC smiles to himself, “Come on Pedro”, he says, “there’s no point you declaring war on us, you wouldn’t stand a chance.”

Pedro replies, “No, no, we’ve had ourselves a meeting, and we’ve decided to declare war on you.”

HC says, “OK Pedro, now listen, I’ve got an air force of over a thousand planes, what kind of air force have you got to match that? It’d be over in no time.”

Pedro says, “Well my neighbor’s got himself a hot-air balloon, and my brother used to work at an airport.”

Chavez laughs, “Oh come on, you’ve not got a hope”.

“Hold on a sec, Mr. Chavez, “ Pedro says, “we’ll just have a quick meeting.” So off he goes and has a quick meeting. “Are you still there Mr. Chavez? Yes, well we’ve had our meeting, and we’ve decided that we’re still going to declare war.”

HC says, “Right then Pedro, well you know, as well as the air force, we’ve also got about a thousand tanks. How are you going to match that.”

“Well,” Pedro says, “I’ve got an old Renault, and my cousin down the road has got a tractor.”

“Get real, ” says HC, “that’s no match at all.”

So Pedro says, “Hold on, I’ll just go and have another meeting.”

“Are you still there Mr. Chavez? Yes, well we’ve had our meeting, and we’ve decided that we’re still going to declare war.”

HC thinks this is just amazing, “Well how many soldiers have you got Pedro?”

“Well,” says Pedro, “there’s me, my kid, my 4 cousins, and they all had sons, and there’s Bill down the road…. I reckon I could get together about 30.”

Laughing openly now HC replies, “Come on Pedro, I’ve got 10,000 highly trained fighting men at my personal disposal. I think you’d better go and have another meeting.”

“I will”, says Pedro, “I will.”

“Are you still there Mr. Chavez? Yes, well we’ve had our meeting, and we’ve decided that we’re not going to declare war on you after all.”

“At last,” replies HC, “What made you change your mind?”

“Well, it’s those 10 thousand soldiers you see. We can’t declare war on you because we’ve not got the facilities to keep all those prisoners!”