financies, Rules, transformation, wealth

This New Year Pull out ALL the Stops!

Are you willing and up for pulling out all the stops in your life? Unless something happens to you, tomorrow will happen for you. You already know how it will go, or maybe not. Would you like to have a today and tomorrow of your choosing?! What’s stopping you? This question has existed for centuries, if not two or three millennia. Frequently we know what to do, and we don’t do it. What’s missing?

I say it’s awareness. A specific kind of awareness. What you are unaware of, you have no choice over. Everything that operates unconsciously keeps us caught in a web of our own making.  Somehow, even if you don’t know how something you are doing is ‘inside’ versus outside, your awareness creates how you feel from moment to moment.  Nothing stops you when in the flow of a certain kind of feeling.

Most of us, most of the time, think that when something happens, some experience of ours triggers a feeling. That is not how it really works.  There is an internal set of pictures or dialogs we have accumulated and associate with every experience we have that generates the feeling.  Someone says something in a particular ‘tone’ of voice, and we instantly become upset, and it is their fault for our feelings because they used that tone! You are unsure where to turn, and the panic in your voice and behavior make it nearly impossible to understand any directions. Once you can catch, notice, or see the missing second step in the process, you have a new source of power and the ability to choose what you create. Once you are aware of your internal dialog, your internal representations will continue to occur with less power over you, and you now have a choice over how you feel.  If we are unaware of the second step, what happens is an “always automatic” response, based on our childhood experience and programming, giving us the same feelings over and over automatically.

Instead of ‘the experience’ triggers ‘the feeling,’ what happens is ‘the experience’ instantly initiates an ‘old picture or dialog’ first, which comes automatically with the same feeling every time.  Until you catch yourself and are aware of the ‘old picture or dialog,’ you are just a robot programmed to do and act the same way over and over. I have noticed mine starts with a ‘something is wrong here,’ this should not be this way, or I don’t like it thought that takes me out of the flow and stops me from being present.

What takes us out of flow? Resistance. What you resist persists. Everything you don’t like about yourself, your life, and your surroundings stays in place because of resistance. We repress or disown everything we believe is bad and wrong, attempting to keep it from our awareness. Everything we think is terrible; we resist. We express it anyway, in dysfunctional and covert ways that create suffering for us and those around us. You didn’t keep a promise to accomplish some simple tasks this week? Notice the feelings of blame, discouragement, panic, and or resignation associated with making yourself and the circumstances around you wrong. As a child, I was told repeatedly what you like least in others, you like least in yourself. Whenever someone or something occurs to you as something wrong with you, it triggers you emotionally and stops you. We attract situations and people with qualities we disown, suppress, and condemn in ourselves, a particular form of attraction.

What you are aware of, you have a choice over. The more aware you are of what you are doing ‘inside,’ creating how you feel and behave gives you choices you didn’t have before. When aware of the people and situations you attract, become attracted to, and what things mean will reveal your perceptions and points of view that can suddenly provide choices over what to do. New points of view, and perceptions, sometimes called insights, provide new freedom to be who you are. What stopped you in the past suddenly disappears.

When we embrace, allow, come to terms with, and re-own those parts of us or our life by becoming aware of them and watching them occur with awareness, new paths open for us and others. e stop being triggered emotionally and discover compassion for ourselves and those still stuck exhibiting the behavior.  ewer people will show what we used to suppress in ourselves, what we disowned and resisted.

Watching our feelings of resistance and upsets, the thoughts and pictures accompanying them, with curiosity and awareness, allows us to re-own what we disowned about ourselves and others, ending the resistance and unpleasant feelings associated with them. ow we behave is generated by our internal state and our feelings. f the feelings, the internal state, is generated automatically and unconsciously, our behavior is automatic and unconscious. That is just the way I am!” When we behave in ways we later regret or fail to accomplish what we set out to achieve, we can be sure it is from an automatic program we are unaware of.

Any area that isn’t working is where we unconsciously focus on and make internal representations of what we don’t want. When we focus on what we don’t like, we immediately create unpleasant feelings and cause our mind to create and attract MORE of what we do not wish to! How long have you been on a diet that only makes you more overweight? How far in debt have you become after every commitment to change your behavior with money? What makes a difference?

“Stop trying to change yourself. Stop trying to put properties inside of yourself. Stop trying to get yourself to do the right thing. Alter the way the world occurs for you, and your actions will naturally alter.”- Werner Erhard.

Watching the internal state, the representations with ‘awareness’ AND directly seeing how they create our feelings and the other internal states enable what does not serve us to fall away. Awareness is not the same as knowing that you do something. Awareness” involves seeing what you do, AS YOU DO IT, to create your feelings, behaviors, and what and whom you attract or become attracted to. Instead of attempting to stop doing something that doesn’t serve you, watch yourself do it with “awareness.” Once you clearly see the result of what you are doing, you will not be able to keep doing it. If you keep doing it, you have yet to watch it with ‘awareness.’ You do not need to evaluate whether something is resourceful or exercise any willpower [fruitless; you already know that has never worked]. JUST WATCH, and the awareness will come.

Until you can change a belief [you may always change them back once you know how], you will unconsciously accumulate ‘evidence’ that the belief is “true.” When something you do not like happens repeatedly, you are likely proving to yourself that some belief of yours is “true.” We prove our beliefs to be true in three ways.  Attract, interpret, and act. We unconsciously attract or are attracted to people and situations that are perfect for helping us be right.  We analyze what happens as evidence that what we believe is true, even if or especially if there are other interpretations.   We will act in a way that makes what we believe come true!

Apply awareness; watching the belief with awareness causes the dysfunction to fall away. Once you watch yourself believe something, KNOWING what you are creating, the belief will fall away IF it doesn’t serve you or others.  Be careful that it isn’t another belief, however. Your motivation and enthusiasm for continuing to believe or create it will disappear once you watch the belief with awareness.

There is a game we play without awareness of ourselves and others. When we are young, we are taught, and we now teach our children, that certain aspects are bad and wrong while others are good.  To be ‘okay,’ good, sound, and likable, we repress or disown the ‘bad’ qualities and do our best to express the ‘good.’ This “Game of Black and White” has the main rule that White MUST Win! Since we potentially have all the qualities, and because we express the disowned qualities anyway, usually in covert and dysfunctional ways, the game is unwinnable.  The disowned qualities are often called shadows.  The way to spot a shadow is to notice what qualities in others trigger us emotionally. What we like least in others, we like least in ourselves… whenever you point the finger at someone, there are three pointing back at you… You do not get along with someone because you are just alike. Many of our issues and problems result from playing the Game of Black and White.

If we continue to disown the shadows, we express them in ways that create suffering for us and others. When we see the shadows with awareness and realize they exist in us, that the feelings and behaviors come from us, they can mature into qualities that benefit us and others. When you re-own your anger, you can make tough decisions for the benefit of all, develop the power to protect others from suffering and generate tough love.  When you re-own your fear, sounding the alarm when there is a real threat makes you and yours safer. When we re-own narcissism, we acquire true self-esteem and real self-love, allowing us to love others generously.

This path of awareness is a mountain without a top. There are some areas I can offer help and guidance to my family, friends, and current and potential clients.  Would you like to be debt-free without changing your lifestyle, refinancing, or adding new income?  I DIDN’T believe it was possible, and you may not either. I can show you a path that comes with a date in your future when all your debt is paid. Absolute freedom appears when there is no mortgage, credit card debt, or loans.  A financial analysis of your situation takes less than an hour of your time, and I discovered it changed my behavior immediately. The belief I was forever in debt led to poor habits and behaviors based on either panic or resignation. Buying cheap items of no real need was so what, what difference does it make. There is another path without stops to your financial freedom.   Investigate now.

Who knew life insurance could provide seriously more value than merely a death benefit (which is a big deal)? How would you like to be your own bank and sit on both sides of the table, borrowing money from yourself and paying yourself back tax-free interest? Sounds too good to be true? I thought so as well. Contact me now, and I will show you how.

Context, Rules, transformation

Context to Perspective, Prejudice to Understanding Part I

Does context tell you how to discriminate?

The context reveals a bias we have about pizza. Both pieces are on a plate and both pieces are perfect.  Unless you are near starving you won’t choose to eat the one on the right.  The prejudice for clean food isn’t good or bad. Many people won’t eat off a plate ‘contaminated’ by someone else. Context lets you justify how you discriminate.   It is just your thinking that makes it so.

“the words, good and bad are meaningless. This is based on science and not on opinion. – Buckminster Fuller [Critical Path 1981]

A recent event [May29, 2020] triggered a bias of mine and I didn’t notice the trigger or the bias initially. I believed what I saw was the truth. It was true but not the entire truth.  When I was 20 a half dozen squad cars came to my parents’ home as I was about to leave for work. The police showed my parents the charges. I was handcuffed and put into one of the squad cars, taken to the police station, interrogated in a small room with a couple policeman and charged with stealing over $10,000.  The proof, circumstantial and using inductive reasoning was profound. Had it been anyone else they were talking about I would have agreed.  I was innocent. NOBODY believed me. Not even the attorney my parents hired. Fortunately, it wasn’t the first time I was all alone. I survived. The person who committed the acts was caught the evening before I was go to trial and prison.  I woke up on a Friday with dread and by 9am relieved.  Nobody ever apologized. They were just doing their job.

I’ve had this ‘trigger’ for almost 50 years. My bias is justified. Doesn’t make it useful however. Most people justify their behavior with their beliefs.  Common. Dangerous and sometimes deadly.  Removing a bias is like attempting to remove your eyeballs.  Whatever you resist persists.  I thought I’d managed it, so I was always aware of its trigger but watching the videos of a policemen kneel on a man’s neck, knowing George Floyd died, dragged up a lot of anger.  I was not in control of the context.  I saw someone murdered by a policeman. But did he know or was he following an accepted way to deal with a suspect?

Days later we learn the police were only doing what they were trained to do. Doesn’t matter, they were fired immediately. The family hired their own medical examiner and got the results they wanted.  The policeman entered the Twilight Zone.  Their lives ruined and thousands of others because of context. Has the press offered any other context?

How often are you ‘aware’ of the context?

Whether you are a victim or successful, happy or sad, interested or not, is made possible with the function of context.  How do you hold your life to be? What prism do you see through? What has you alter the view? Can you change your context? When you learn how, you can see the world through a kaleidoscope of context spinning new versions of reality by the second.  What is true? How close to the truth is it?

I am “the conviction that there are no “good” or “bad” people, no matter how offensive or eccentric to society they may seem. I am confident that if I were born and reared under the same circumstances as any other known humans, I would have behaved much as they have.”  – Buckminster Fuller

Take a pause and consider what contexts you hold money, earning it, spending it.  How others manage it and use it.  Is profit a problem for you in some way.  Do ‘nonprofits’ actually operate without a profit? What pays for salaries?

Part II will look more closely at what we see and what we don’t see. Leave a comment. Let me know if I am missing a context.

financies, internet marketing, Rules, transformation, wealth

Quitting is at the End of Perseverance

You could move your circle or escape from it or teleport.

I believe the cause for quitting, the end of perseverance, is a misguided single commitment to strain, struggle, and sacrifice.  All three may be necessary for some of you, however.  Listen to the demands of your amygdala, force feed your day through an impossible schedule created by you and a twinkle of doubt will slip in.  Faith moves mountains and doubt creates them. There is another way, the way of effortlessness.

When I was young my father modeled context and point of view as the way to deal with any situation. Up until the day he died at nearly 93, he modeled an open and willing to listen attitude. It is not what we think [believe] the problem is, the problem is our thinking.  The short version is ‘you can’t fix stupid.’ Every time Dad would say, “What you like least in others is what you like least in yourself”, I paid attention.  Every time it was true.  Still is.  It was much later that I realized what I liked about people, what I saw in them that I appreciated, was also in me. How else would you see it? Inside all the mind chatter some whisper of a voice nudged me to see and turn left here or turn around or just be still.  I named the path ‘following the breadcrumbs’ after “give us this day our daily bread”.

In my teens I realized the source and cause for every upset, disappointment, anger, and discouragement were MY “expectations”.  Some form of ‘This shouldn’t be this way…’  (e.g. software should never be a problem or why don’t you listen?)  In fact, all why questions are based on some underlying belief you have, determining how you think and feel.  Take inventory of yours, your expectations, your whys, how many are in violation of another rule you believe is essential.  If you want to be willing to listen, notice your rules. Engaging with people and your upsets never works in my experience. You are listening to your arguments.

Initially I was able to adjust my expectations to more match the outcomes and yet there were times I was stuck with an upset.  Eventually I realized the source of my expectations are my preferences. Once I noticed my preference for something, I saw I could experiment with any event as ‘what is the lesson here?’ or ‘what am I supposed to learn from this?’ What would a day look like and feel like without any preferences? 

I suspect we have extraordinarily little to do with the result.  The difference between crazy, doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result and perseverance, continuing until the desired outcome, is indistinguishable for most us. The folks in the ‘stands’ are either shouting keep on going or give it up already. Who do you listen for? What changes your ‘listening’? Consider ignoring the stands and discover your own path, follow the breadcrumbs laid out for you each day.

There is a barrier to overcome. The ‘difficulty’ is matter of perspective.

The dictionary has some earth-shattering distinctions.  I’ve done dozens of goal courses since high school.  So, I have some stories about goals.  Laundry lists of goals, broken down into daily bites to conform to my schedule.  Maria Nemeth wrote the dictionary says, “A goal is an object or an event towards which PLAY is directed in order to score”.  I was struggling at the time, discouraged that nothing was enjoyable anymore.  I collapsed what ‘score’ I wanted with each of my goals and lost play in the bargain. I was stuck in strain, struggle, and sacrifice.  I could not get out of the funk, and there was no inspiration anywhere… just work, a special kind of misery.  Noticing the requirement for play broke the connection and made score and goal distinct again.  Score takes care of herself.

I assert the sole purpose of a goal, a promise, even a commitment is that it inspires you, it calls you into action and effortless action is the most fun.  If you are not called into action, adjust the promise, commitment, or goal so you are inspired again.  If your integrity is important to you, if you want any chance at building your willpower stronger, do not quit. WHAT inspires you today!? Inspiration is an essential part of effortlessness.  That ‘mustard seed of faith’ often chanted still requires something LESS to work: ZERO doubt.  All the faith in the world is destroyed by a glimmer, a mere hint of doubt.

Have you forgotten or lost your ability to work without doubt? Watch young children play. When does doubt disappear for you? How long are you able to maintain zero doubt during the day? What happens and THEN doubt appears?

You do not get any extra points for suffering, unless you make up the rules of the game that way. – Michael Neill

You can have anything you want, providing you first let go of wanting it. – Lester Levenson

It is your choice. Have fun while you succeed or strain, sacrifice and struggle your rear end off to success. What say you? Coming from fun makes every task you’re doing an opportunity. Consider playing with the team I’m on. The only thing stopping you is your thinking.

Following enchanted ‘breadcrumbs’ produces magic, miracles and MOJO. [Happiness] You don’t have to go looking for it when it’s where you come from.